No Monkey Progress Today, I’m All Over The Internet, How to Baffle Your Friends, and This Is My Longest Title And My Longest Post

HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEllo.

As my title complies, I have no monkey progress. Yet. It’s understandable that I can’t find the time to sit down and knit, because I’m baking cookies, writing books, and otherwise juggling occasions of my life. I’m also a huge, hungry bookworm, and it’s hard for me to substitute a fun book and great story for watching my fingers knit. I promise, though, I’ll knit as hard as I can today.

Also.

Breaking news from the top of the blogosphere:

I’m on the internet.

Yes, these words are on the internet, but I can be found all over the internet now. For example, here’s a search for my blog URL. This one’s for just ‘bluegirlblueworld’. This link’s for my blog tagline.  You can also find me through WordPress.com tags and subjects, such as my most popular: music, nature,  Christmas, creativity, cookies, carnivores, new poems, and writing. People are clicking my comments to find their way here. (if you like me so much, SUBSCRIBE!)

And one more thing. Do you celebrate Valentine’s Day? Have a happy one. You could cut out a valentine, cut letters and words from old magazines and paste them to the heart, and put it in an envelope addressed to your sweetheart, anonymously written. (I’m doing that myself for a couple of friends. I just hope Lee-lee, as her nickname goes, and Jill don’t read my blog now.)

That’s all. For now. I mostly just felt like posting after such radio silence. And…I missed my Friday post, because I forgot. Yes, I’ll post an actual blog post, and not monkey pictures, every Friday, so that those who don’t really like knitting will have something to stare at.

So, to make up for Friday, I’ll talk about Tricks for your friends.

Have you ever wanted to figure out what your friend is thinking? Here’s a way. I’ll tell you to do it, and if your math is good, I will be able to tell what you’re thinking, anonymous person.

1. Pick a number. It’s easier if it’s not an integer or anything above 100.

2. Double it.

3. Add fourteen. (or any number that can be divided easily by two)

4. Divide by two.

5. Subtract the first number you thought of from this new number.

6. Is your new number 7 (or half of the number you added)?

Hah. Tell it to your friends and they will bow down to you forever. But, it’s time for another trick. Grab something. A coin, or small stone, is perfect. Don’t use a knife, scissors, a pencil, or an egg until you are really good at this.

Bend your right or left arm backwards. Grab your shoulder with that arm’s hand, then level your arm and turn your hand palm-up. Place your chosen object on the tip of your elbow, as close as possible without it falling off. Now, quickly, drop your elbow and move your hand forward in a straight line. When you feel something hit your hand, close it. If your reflexes are good, and you did this right, you should have the object in your hand. If the object hit your hand and smacked off the floor, try again. Don’t worry if you can’t get it right in a few tries, just practice.

Now you need a big bowl or pot. Fill a small cup with water, wine, juice, or something else, like vodka, and put it on the floor. Put your bowl or pot over the cup. (If it won’t fit, you need a smaller cup or larger bowl, or both.) Grab a friend or two. Or more. Tell them, “I will drink the *whatever you filled the cup with* without touching the bowl.” Show them what’s in the cup, and put the bowl over it. Sit down two feet from the bowel and close your eyes. Pretend you’re slurping something through a straw. Open your eyes and say, “Go ahead and look now.” They’ll lift the bowl up. Reach forward and grab the cup, and drink it. When you’re done, smile and say, “See? I drank it without touching the bowl.” They should laugh when they get the joke. If they don’t, and they get mad, run for your very life.

I hope none of those tricks endangered your life. And, hooray, I reached over 700 words! See you soon with monkeys.

~Aidyl

Note: When I first posted this, I got distracted and said “bowel” instead of “bowl”. 🙂  (If you don’t know what “bowel” means, go look it up)

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